Laying out guidelines for dating as followers of Jesus will alter lives by keeping people out of toxic and unhealthy relationships and ultimately marriages. Most importantly, guidelines and principles for dating will transform lives and shape eternities. So, this is incredibly important. We have a responsibility to be pro-active. So, I am starting the conversation. I hope and pray these words spark conversations in your ministries, relationships, and homes. Here are 10 important principles for Christian dating. If you need to take a minute to let that sink in, I will be here when you get back….
That would make God a gambler, and the Bible clearly says gambling is from the devil only joking. The beauty of marriage is God sustains you despite your flaws.
Why Aren’t Christian Singles Dating?
If you are a Christian, there is no reason to date without a trajectory towards marriage. Now, I want to clarify what I mean. Dating with a trajectory towards marriage means dating with a purpose. It means dating someone who meets the values and goals you have for a future spouse more on that later. We are intentional beings. We are designed to know why we do stuff and where we are going.
Dating is no different. You might get into a relationship with someone who loves Jesus, meets the values you have in a future spouse, and is compatible with you. Maybe they like to cuddle with cats or something.
Having coffee or going to eat dinner with the opposite sex is not dating. Dating is more intimate. It involves sharing personal struggles and vulnerability. So, if you choose not to get coffee or watch a movie with the opposite sex, then whatever. He is the pie. There will be days when life is crashing down, your faith is wavering, and the only thing left is your spouse.
This is the beauty of a sanctifying marriage. Go to a basketball game. Be willing to serve one another.
10 Principles For Christian Dating That Will Transform Lives – Frank Powell
Put one another above yourselves. Find how to show love to each other. Use the love God has shown you and bring it to your boyfriend or girlfriend. Bring out all of "The 'Fruit' of the Spirit": This will work to relieve stress in relationships in this World of troubles.
Cheerfully realize this is a package—not bits or pieces: Against such things there is no law. Have Fun and Praise and Glorify God. Smile and know that God is with you. Enjoy the life that God has given the both of you. Whenever you get the chance, praise God for whatever He has poured into your life. Trust and know that God has your back.
He wants what is best for the both of you. Cherish your own personal 'God time'. Make sure you spend time alone with God. You need moments of reading the Bible, journaling or praying just between you and God. Since God is your ultimate love, it is good to have that time alone with Him. Keep in mind the reality that God is real.
His love is real. Realize that God is working in your life right now.
His forgiveness is real and His promises are real. Give the love God has given you to your boyfriend or girlfriend. Remember though, "You are not your own, you were bought at a price" - therefore God must reign in your relationships. We are called to be holy, because He is holy. We might very well have to "honor [our] father and mother, [our] wife and children, [our] brothers and sisters--yes, even [our] own life--"; our dating relationships are no exception.
Lewis has said, that love that becomes a god, becomes a demon. Submit all your love, therefore, to the one that is Love, and He, like a gardener, shall prune our loves which are so fickle and temporary by nature, into beautiful gardens which we may share with all our relationships including our dating relationships.
Being single is a time to reflect upon what is it is that makes you happy, what you can do to improve upon yourself. Right now might not be the time to be with someone, because deep down inside you have to learn how to work on you, love you first in order to love someone else. Do what makes you happy, find yourself, think about the future, what goals you wish to seek, think about yourself, and when feeling discouraged, pray.
Being single can bring you closer to God, as you'll have more time to work on your relationship with Him. Not Helpful 4 Helpful I have a girlfriend and we had sex before I accepted Jesus Christ into my life. Can we marry, as we've agreed to abstain from sex until after marriage? Getting married is a big deal and a lifelong commitment, so don't marry just so you can have sex again.
If you love her and you're absolutely serious about making this commitment, then of course you can marry her.
Not Helpful 0 Helpful Not Helpful 6 Helpful I'm dating a guy that believes sex makes us intimate. I have tried talking him out of it, but it's not working. What should I do? If he loves you, then he will listen to you and respect your wishes. Intimacy can be gained in plenty of ways besides sex -- laying and talking together, walking and holding hands, or just being together can all build intimacy. Sex is easy, but intimacy is harder. Let him know that you will not change your mind about this, but that you would like to practice building intimacy with some other methods.
Not Helpful 1 Helpful Although looks are what draw people to each other initially, it is personality that keeps them interested. Christians believe in marriage, so pursuing a girl you really like is the first step to that end. Not Helpful 5 Helpful How do I deal with emotions and sexual feelings when dating a Christian guy?
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Just make sure that you don't push things further than he is ready for, as Christianity supports abstinence up until marriage, and then only with your spouse. As for emotions, open and honest communication is always best. Not Helpful 3 Helpful Is it okay for a black boy and white girl to have feelings for each other? Not Helpful 16 Helpful What do I do in a relationship when I feel that I'm being pushed away? Back off, walk away. That other person may not know how to tell you it's over.
Maybe when you do leave, absence will make the heart grow fonder, and all the little things appreciated about you will be missed and your phone will start ringing. Not Helpful 10 Helpful Does the situation I put myself in invite sexual immorality or help me avoid it? What kind of reputation does my potential date have? Remember 1 Corinthians Will there be any pressure to use alcohol or drugs? Don't give up your values for a date. Am I attracting the wrong type of person? Make sure that the message you send with your actions doesn't attract people who will lead you to compromise your values.
Am I aware that sin is first committed in the heart? Are you going to the right kind of place for a date? Many good intentions have been forgotten because the temptation and opportunity were too great. Am I doing anything to encourage sexual desire? Don't engage in any impure contact that is sexually motivated, such as petting. You can start fresh with God anytime you want to.
His word tells us that sexual sin is wrong, and He knows what is best. God knows that going too far before marriage tends to break up couples and leads to less happy marriages. He knows that most guys do not want to marry a girl who has been intimate with someone else. Net users generous rights for putting this page to work in their homes, personal witnessing, churches and schools. What are the Biblical guidelines for dating relationships?